Understanding Separation Anxiety in Pets: Causes, Symptoms, and Solutions

People usually notice separation anxiety when they come home to shredded doorframes, noise complaints, or a dog that has soiled inside despite being toilet-trained. Sometimes it’s quieter: a pet that stops eating when left alone, drools, trembles, or paces until you return.

The practical problem is sorting “they were bored” from “they were distressed”, because the fix is different. Separation anxiety improves with careful, reward-based training and management, not punishment or long goodbyes. A vet check matters too, because pain, illness, noise fears, or confinement anxiety can look similar.^{1, 4}

What separation anxiety is (and what it isn’t)

Separation anxiety (often described as separation-related behaviour) is distress that shows up when a pet is left alone, or separated from a particular person. The hallmark is timing: the behaviour starts as you prepare to leave, soon after you go, and often settles when you return.^{1, 7}

It can be mistaken for other common problems, including:

• Undertraining (especially toilet training in young dogs)
• Normal exploratory chewing (particularly in adolescents)
• Barking triggered by outside sights/sounds rather than being alone
• Noise aversion (storms, fireworks) that happens to occur while you’re out
• Confinement anxiety (panic in a crate or small room)

A proper plan starts by ruling these out, because the wrong approach can accidentally make the distress stronger over time.⁴

Common triggers and risk factors

Separation anxiety often appears after a change that shifts a pet’s sense of predictability. Some animals cope well with disruption; others struggle, and the pattern can set in quickly.

Situations that commonly precede it

• A new work schedule or longer days away from home
• Moving house or changing household members
• A period of constant companionship (holidays, illness, working from home), followed by sudden absences
• Rehoming, shelter transitions, or repeated changes of caregivers

Individual differences

Temperament matters. Some dogs are more prone to anxious behaviour generally, and distress can cluster with other fears (such as noise sensitivity). Breed can influence behaviour tendencies, but it’s not a neat “breed X gets separation anxiety” rule—environment, learning history, and daily routine usually matter more than labels.²

Signs to look for (dogs and cats)

Separation anxiety is easiest to recognise by its pattern: signs appear around departures and during time alone, not randomly throughout the day.^{1, 7}

Behavioural signs (often reported first)

• Howling, barking, whining (often soon after you leave)^{1, 2}
• Destructive behaviour, especially near exits (doors, windows, gates)¹
• Toileting indoors, even in animals that are usually reliable^{1, 2}
• Restlessness: circling, pacing, repetitive movements¹
• Refusing food or ignoring enrichment toys only when alone¹

Physical signs (easy to miss)

• Drooling, panting, trembling¹
• Vomiting or stress-related gut upsets¹
• Over-grooming (more common in cats), sore paws from licking, or other self-injury patterns¹

How cats may show it

Cats can be more subtle. Some become vocal or destructive; others simply retreat and stop eating while you’re away. A cat that urinates outside the litter tray also needs a medical check promptly—urinary disease is common and can look like “behaviour”.

How to check whether it’s truly separation anxiety

The clearest evidence comes from observing what happens when you’re not there. Many dogs with separation-related distress look “fine” when their person is home, so the problem stays invisible unless you catch it in the act.¹

Practical ways to gather clues

• Use a camera (an old phone, pet cam, or security camera) to see when the behaviour starts and what it looks like.¹
• Keep a simple log: departure time, return time, exercise that day, what your pet was left with, and what you found on return.
• Note the “leaving cues”: some pets start to unravel when keys jingle or shoes go on, before you even touch the door.²

Why a vet (and sometimes a behaviourist) matters

A veterinarian can rule out medical contributors and help you decide whether to bring in an accredited behaviour professional for a structured plan, especially if there’s self-injury, escape attempts, or severe panic. Behaviour medicine services commonly rely on history plus video, because that’s where the real pattern shows itself.^{4, 8}

Management and training that actually helps

The aim is not to “teach independence” through force. It’s to change what being alone predicts, so your pet learns that separation is safe, temporary, and followed by good things.

1) Prevent rehearsal of panic where you can

If a dog panics every day for weeks, the pattern can become more entrenched. Where possible, reduce long stretches alone while you train: a family member, neighbour, dog sitter, or day care can buy you time to work below your pet’s panic threshold.⁴

2) Gradual desensitisation (time alone in tiny, safe doses)

Start at a level your pet can handle without distress—sometimes that’s stepping out of sight for a second—then build in small increments. If you see pacing, barking, drooling, or frantic door-watching, you’ve gone too far, too fast. Adjust down and try again.²

3) Counterconditioning (pair “alone time” with something good)

Counterconditioning means consistently pairing the early stages of being alone with rewards, so the emotional response shifts from alarm to calm expectation. It works best alongside desensitisation, and it’s usually slow, repetitive work—not a weekend fix.^{6, 7}

4) Set up the environment to make calm easier

• Food enrichment: long-lasting chews and puzzle feeders can help some dogs settle, but they only work if your dog will actually eat when you’re gone.¹
• A safe resting place: many dogs do better if they have a consistent, quiet spot they can choose, rather than being followed around the house by worries.³
• Routine: predictable meals, exercise and rest can reduce background arousal, which makes training more effective.^{2, 4}

5) Avoid punishment (it backfires)

Scolding after you come home won’t connect to what happened earlier. It links your return with threat, which can worsen anxiety the next time you leave. Reward-based training is the safer, more reliable path for separation problems.⁵

Calming products and medication: where they fit

Some households find calming aids useful as support, but they don’t replace training. If distress is severe, medication prescribed by a veterinarian can reduce suffering and make learning possible, especially when panic is frequent or intense. This is a conversation to have early rather than as a last resort.²

Prevention (especially for puppies and newly adopted pets)

Prevention is mostly about gentle practice: brief separations that stay below the point of distress, repeated often, and folded into normal life. Many dogs benefit from learning that being alone is ordinary and safe, not a dramatic event.¹

• Practise short absences before you need longer ones.
• Keep departures low-key and consistent.
• Build daily habits that include independent settling (resting on a bed, chewing a toy) while you move around the house.

When to get professional help sooner rather than later

Bring in professional support if any of the following are true:

• Your pet is injuring themselves, damaging teeth/claws, or breaking through doors, windows, crates, or fences.
• The behaviour is escalating, or you’re getting neighbour complaints.
• Your dog will not eat at all when left alone, even with high-value food toys.
• You suspect an underlying medical problem, or the toileting changes are sudden.

Start with your veterinarian, who can check health factors and help you find an accredited behaviour professional if needed. Video of the behaviour is often the fastest way to get an accurate plan.^{8, 9}

Final thoughts

Separation anxiety is not stubbornness and it’s not a “dominance” problem. It’s distress tied to absence, and it tends to improve when you treat it like a learning and welfare issue: reduce panic rehearsals, train in tiny steps, and reward calm. When the signs are severe, a vet-led plan — sometimes including medication — can bring the whole household back to something quieter and more predictable.^{2, 4}

References

1. RSPCA (UK) – Recognising separation-related behaviour and anxiety in dogs
2. Cornell University College of Veterinary Medicine – Anxious behavior: how to help your dog cope with unsettling situations
3. RSPCA (UK) – Understanding your dog’s behaviour (safe space and reward-based training)
4. Merck Veterinary Manual – Behavioural problems of dogs (including separation distress disorder)
5. RSPCA (UK) – How to train your dog to stay home alone
6. Merck Veterinary Manual – Treatment of behaviour problems in animals (desensitisation and counterconditioning)
7. RSPCA (UK) – Treating separation anxiety
8. Cornell University College of Veterinary Medicine – Behavior Medicine service (what to expect, value of history and video)
9. RSPCA (UK) – Find a clinical animal behaviourist (start with your vet; seek accredited help)